A narcissist is described as having some or all of the following traits:
- An obvious self-focus in interpersonal exchanges
- Problems in sustaining satisfying relationships
- A lack of psychological awareness
- Difficulty with empathy.
- Problems distinguishing the self from others
- Hypersensitivity to any insults or imagined insults.
- Vulnerability to shame rather than guilt
- Haughty body language
- Flattery towards people who admire and affirm them
- Detesting those who do not admire them
- Using other people without considering the cost of doing so
- Pretending to be more important than they really are
- Bragging (subtly but persistently) and exaggerating their achievements
- Claiming to be an “expert” at many things
- Inability to view the world from the perspective of other people
- Denial of remorse and gratitude.
What is amazing to the rest of us is how a person of this nature can believe that they are “ok”. The person who is a narcissist truly believes themselves to be right in all things.
In my experience, that person will never accept responsibility for an error, but rather become excessively defensive and lash out, sometimes to a very ugly extreme. This person will proclaim someone to be their closest friend but the moment that “friend’s” back is turned, the narcissist will cut them down in every possible way to whomever will listen. The narcissist has no close friends and believes themselves to be superior in every way.
This person fights a neverending battle. They are constantly struggling with their seclusion from everyone else, and yet they are the reason no one is close. They allow no one to get close.
To be near a narcissist is to be thrown under the bus on a regular basis. It is to be lied to and about daily. It is to be always on your guard for that knife that is aimed toward your back. Trust is NOT an option.
Do I speak from personal experience? YOU BETCHA!