Vanity Run Amock

I watched the girl next door getting ready for her date last night.  Granted, she was in her apartment and I was in mine, but our windows face each other and she never pulls her curtains.  Ok, if I were truly a gentleman, I would pull MY curtains closed and not watch, but I never even pretended to be a gentleman.  I am also exceptionally curious.   I grew up in a household of guys.  My Dad, my three brothers and I were all there was. My Mom left when I was 8 years old and we never heard from her again.  I have my own idea of why she left but it doesn’t matter.

So, about this neighbor.   I think her name is Tara.  I have never actually met the girl, but I heard her in there talking with a friend of hers one day and I am sure the friend called her Tara.  I am, of course, only guessing at the spelling.   I don’t really know anything about Tara except what I see, so I have made up her life inside my head.  Well, ok, it started out in my head but then there were so many details that I had to write them down so I wouldn’t forget.

Tara is 24 or 25 and she works for an advertising firm.  She is an account rep or something like that. I decided this because she doesn’t act like any secretary I ever saw.  The other thing about Tara is that it takes her exactly 1 hour and 38 minutes to get ready every morning.  

At first, I just watched as I drank my morning coffee, but then I started noticing all kinds of details and I started to take note of all those things that she, and probably all girls, do when they are getting ready.  I watched as she combed out her wet hair after her shower. {No, I never saw her actually showering.  Her bathroom was on the other side of the building}  She would comb it and comb it and rub some kind of stuff into it and then comb through it about 14 more times.  She would then put on makeup.  What a production THAT is!  I never knew it took so much stuff for a girl to look like that.  Personally, it seems like a crappy waste of money and time to me, but I have to admit, the end result is pretty awesome. 

So, Tara puts on all this makeup.  She has a routine and never strays from the process.  Everything is done in the same order every time.  Stuff all over her face.  Stuff on her eyes. Stuff on her eyelashes, then more stuff all over her face.  On those times when she also puts that paint on her fingernails, you can add about 30 minutes or so to her routine.  Anyway, it began to be a very interesting show to watch. 

When she finished all that stuff, she would move out of my line of sight and when she came back 15 or 20 minutes later, she would be completely dressed.  She would then sit at her mirror and try on  jewelry.  Sometimes she would go through 4 or 5 necklaces before she was satisfied.  Sometimes she would change her ear bobs 3 or 4 times, too.  But overall, 1 hour and 38 minutes later, Tara  would stand up, look herself over carefully, smile just a little and leave.

Since her apartment house opened to the next street over, I never saw her leave, but I didn’t need to. I was certain she walked to the corner and caught a cab that took her to her high rise office building where she might even be some kind of manager.  She was a good manager, I was sure.   She was kind but she was firm and she was fair.  People liked working for her if they did their best. If they slacked off, they didn’t like her much because she wouldn’t put up with any nonsense.  I just knew that.

All of this was in my notes and I was convinced I was pretty close to the truth.  I was also sure that she didn’t date much because I never saw a man in her apartment..until that Thursday night.   It was the night that changed everything.

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